Social Injustice ~A Night at Uplift

I can change the world.
I can.
Me.

And so can each and every one of you reading this. “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. … We need not wait to see what others do.” As I drove home tonight, the words of Mahatma Gandhi rang over and over again in my head. BE the change you want to see in the world. Don't wait for others to do it. If you see something that deserves to be changed, and you're sitting around with your friends talking about how appalling it is that nothing has been done, do something about it yourself.

I fall short of the woman who God wants me to be. I am imperfect. But, I know that I try. I am passionate about life. I am child-like at heart, and I like it that way. As I drove home from Uplift, an organization that serves the homeless population of Kansas City, I called my mom and told her about my experience and how I felt what can only be described as a high. I felt so alive tonight. More alive than I have felt in a long time.

It all started back in 2006, while I was attending Benedictine College taking a Catholic Social Teaching class co-taught by Dr. Rick Coronado. He got up in front of the class and taught straight from Pope Leo XIII's 1891 encyclical letter Rerum Novarum, which I of course didn't understand a word of.

In the encyclical, it preaches economic Distributism and condemns Socialism.

The basic teachings include:  the importance of human dignity, that each and every person is made in the image and likeness of God and deserves to be treated with respect; complementarianism, which talks about the equal dignity of a man and a woman but emphasizes the complementary needs and mutual support between the two; solidarity, which is a strong commitment of a person to the common good of all realizing that each person is dependent on all humanity; charity, which gives us real substance to our relationship with God and with others; subsidiarity, Pope Pius XI said, "It is a fundamental principle of social philosophy, fixed and unchangeable, that one should not withdraw from individuals and commit to the community what they can accomplish by their own enterprise and/or industry."; and finally distributism, where economic distribution should be promoted by wide ownership of corporations (for example, credit unions).

Confused? I was too. Until I took the opportunity for some extra credit that changed my life. Dr. Coronado told us about Uplift, which was an organization that served the homeless of Kansas City. All we had to do was drive down with him, and volunteer our time for one night and then write a paper. Too easy. So, I attempted to aide my declining grade by taking him up on his offer. What I found within this humble organization was a personification of each of the principles of Pope Leo's letter. The compassion I witnessed that night was beyond amazing. I realized then, what I was reminded of tonight. That each and every one of us can do something to change the world. I can get in my car and drive to the inner city, get on a truck loaded down with donations from generous schools, churches and businesses, and go and meet people where they are. In serving others, I find a peace within myself. But, not just a peace. It is so much more than that. It is a feeling that starts as a warm fuzzy in my heart and permeates every inch of my body. I am filled with a joy and am inspired to do more. I want to talk to these people that society has cast aside and deemed unworthy to walk amongst the rest of us. I want to look them in the eyes and tell them that they are no different from me. That they are worthy of dignity and respect. And they are! Who's to say that because someone has fallen on economic difficulty, or has a mental incapacity that they are less worthy of love and acceptance of other people? And yet they live under bridges by the river, tucked away under the highway overpasses, and in the woods behind a Price Chopper. Hidden from our view, because we don't want to see them.

They walk out to the trucks and humbly ask for what they need: toilet paper, candles, tshirts, underwear, soap, drinking water. They call us 'sir' and 'ma'am' and it isn't uncommon to hear them utter 'God bless you' or 'have a blessed day, ma'am' from them as they walk away with their shopping bag of necessities. They, the poorest of the poor, even realize the importance of human dignity and solidarity. Do you?

I found an old post

Written October 20, 2010

Things are coming to a close. I am officially an active duty soldier as of today. I report tomorrow evening and will begin my journey to our mobilization site. As I sit here, contemplating my life, I wonder about how I got here. Nothing in my recent, or even distant past hints to this change of events that has me on my way to a deployment in a little over a month. High school was rough, as it is for every teenager--but it was still an amazing experience. I was all-academic, swim team captain, varsity letter all four years. I was in honors courses and participated in a plethora of extra curricular activities including but not limited to science club, flag squad, and choir. I graduated with National Honor Society GPA and went off to find myself at college..instead I found friends, all nighters, and a boy named Casey.
I thought my life was complete. I transfered to the University of Kansas where I was going to finish my degree as Casey finished his--we were going to get married and start a wonderful life together, until we ended up pregnant.
One surprise event and a year can change so much....
A year later, I was single, without child, and enlisting in the Army National Guard. It is amazing how life can change in one year. I was on a path, a planned, chosen path. I loved my path, I walked my path with joy and happiness--but all of a sudden in one year--my path took an unexpected turn. The environment around me on the path turned cold, there was snow and ice. I had been dressed for summer and the beach--I wasn't prepared for this unexpected change. People ask me about my life during the time when the path turned and I honestly can't speak on it very well. I don't even know what happened myself. All I know is that I was headed off to the Army. I am just now thawing from that flash winter that I experienced.
Just in time.
I have learned to embrace whatever comes my way. Live moment by moment, because I never know when something--some unexpected event is going to change my life forever. So, I live it. Every smile. Every tear. Every upset stomach and anxiety attack. Every laugh. Every embarrassment. I live it.

Questions

Who am I? What am I doing here? What is the point of life? Do I believe in God? If I do, what place does this mysterious being have in my life? Do I live for me? Do I live for someone else? Why in the HELL do things get taken away from me, just when I start to be happy?

There are too many questions in life to get caught up in. We have to be who we are. But, what if we don’t know who that person is? Well then, we just do our best with what we’ve got. Take me, for example. In college, pregnant (major cool points), with a boyfriend in the Army—but I was happy. My ‘ex’ was a heartless coward who was just trying to escape responsibilities, and my daughter is gone to me. However, without that experience—I wouldn’t have ran away and joined the Army myself. The Army. It has given me purpose. It has also taken me away from the people I love. But even in that, I have found another chapter of my life I would have never expected. I found a man, maybe not a great man, but a man nonetheless who showed me that it was okay to be cared for. Trials and tribulations and many tears led me to a man who I cannot begin to describe well enough to do him justice. He will tell me that he’s not perfect, but he is everything I’ve ever dreamed for. He is my best friend, and all of a sudden—he became the man who I love. Without all the pain and the heartache of my past that has brought me here today, sitting in my car with the windows down smelling the rain and listening to Fink on repeat, I never would have met the amazing man who calls me his girlfriend.

And then the questions set in again. But the only question I have is, who cares? If you don’t have love, what do you have? People are meant to come in and out of your life, to show you things, or to change you in some way. You will travel many different places, do different things--some you never would have imagined yourself being or doing. But that doesn’t matter, does it? All it matters is where you are now. And if you’re happy.

So sit at home, and ask your questions. Not me. I am happy to bumble through this life, just being me. Some people will be missed—but I have one characteristic that I live by. I never lie. I will always tell the truth and I will always be true to myself.

A Very Merry Christmas

Well in just about an hour and a half, the clock will strike 0001 (military time) and it will be Christmas Day! I can't begin to explain the excitement! I almost feel as if I am a little kid again, which is how I have been feeling a lot--in a good way. I have traveled back in time, living at home, going to the high school everyday (where I am long term substituting), and doing chores.
All week long we have been going to this relatives house or that relatives house for Christmas dinners and celebrations, but tomorrow is the time we have all been waiting for...SANTA'S COMING! I know him!!!
It has been different, since this is the first time I have had a family around to celebrate with. It is exactly what I had imagined in my head; love and joy and cheer and running around with cousins and being merry. I have been over and abundantly blessed this year. Even if I ended up waking up on the 23rd at around 0500 crying in pain. Every time I swallowed, it was like someone was stabbing me in my throat. I tried to go back to sleep, but that just wasn't an option. One of my first thoughts was, 'I don't want to miss Christmas!' My mom-mom, Diane, drove me to Walmart so I could invest in some numbing spray and then drove through Steak n' Shake for a little milkshake. Ice cream makes everything better! With the numbing spray and some Tylenol, I was able to sleep a few more hours. When I woke up, I was still in pain--so I called my doctor who told me I could come in if I could get there in 20 minutes. Yikes! I didn't care, I halfway wiped the acne medication off my face, pulled on some sweatpants and ran out the door. I drove a little bit fast on the way there and made it just in time. Turns out, I had strep throat. Gross. I got my prescription for penicillin and was on my way. I drove home, and Diane went to fill my prescription for me and got me a shake to numb my throat a little bit. (I loved all the ice cream that comes with strep!) I basically became one with my bed for the next day, and found out that strep is a great weight loss program! It comes with loss of appetite and nausea! Oh, and a great heating system in the form of a fierce fever. I have had the penicillin in my system for about 36 hours now and am feeling 90% better. I am still a little nauseous, but I downed a Jimmy Johns sandwich earlier, and it was fantastic! Even with this little hiccup, I am totally blessed this Christmas season.

I just recently found out that one of my best friends is going to have her clinical about an hour and a half away from my house. We have been apart since we became friends, but since the invention of facebook and texting in addition to random weekend visits (or even just a 24 hour section of time) here and there--we have stayed and grown as friends. So, I could hardly contain my excitement when she texted me to tell me that she will live so close for 6 weeks this spring!

Oh, and I am madly in puppy love with my boyfriend who gets on a plane to fly from Kuwait to the United States in the next couple of days. We have now been apart for almost half of our relationship--but with a few bumps, we're still doing pretty good. I am grateful for this man who has taught me that it's okay to love again after three years of a sort of a drought. He is amazing and I love him very much. We are going to do our own Christmas when he gets home and settled.

I have also been blessed by a very special little boy who has been working really hard to do better in school. I have been volunteering a little bit at an after school program called G.U.M. Park, which is where I met him. He has really touched my heart, and he has big dreams to play football. Today, I got a Christmas card in the mail from him thanking me for helping him. It was so sweet!

My sister, Taylor, and some of her friends at school have totally blown me away. They organized an item drive at their high school and collected over 1500 items to ship overseas to some Soldiers in Afghanistan. They mailed 32 boxes of goodies and selflessly gave of their time and efforts for these 200 young men fighting for our freedom. I couldn't have been more proud of her, it gives me goosebumps just thinking about it.

I could go on, and on about the recent blessings in my life--but I would just write until my fingers were blistered and calloused--and I don't know if I mentioned, but I have some presents to open in the morning.

God bless you all and have a *Merry Christmas*

To baby girl:

Deep breath.

I'm sitting here shaking as I write this. The letter I never want to write. Tears are streaming down my face. I wonder how many cups I could fill with the tears I've cried for you. I'm a writer. I write, it is simply what I do--but for some reason I have never been able to write this letter to you.

Simple things will trigger a reaction. Tonight, a crappy movie. Other times, news of a friend's pregnancy. A picture of you, or simply just a thought about how things could be. Did I do the right thing for you? How would our lives be, if we were together. I can imagine it. I might have finished school--but most likely I wouldn't have. I would have moved home, for the support, and gotten a job. You would have been raised in daycare--which isn't bad, it just isn't what I dreamed for you. I dreamed of a loving home, with two parents--so you can know what it's like to have the love of a father--something I never knew. I wanted you to be Daddy's Little Girl, a princess!

Baby girl, I have so much love for you. I know you are happy when I talk to you. Your beautiful little smile melts my heart. When you tell me you love me, it chokes me up--but I always swallow it down and reply with a cheery 'Awe! I love you too!'

I don't know how things are going to turn out. I hope you are happy. I hope you know or will know just how much I love you. Please know that I am not miserable. I met a guy, and I love him. I don't know what is going to happen between us--but he has made me realize that it's okay to move on after three years and love again. So for that, I thank him.

I hope you are as proud of me as I am of you. I'm happy. I pray to God that I made the right decision--but as my grandmother always says, 'there's no use crying over spilt milk.' She is so right. The decision has been made. Whether you're angry or not is your choice, but please know that it was not an easy decision for me to make. I didn't want to do it, but I wanted you to have a better life. Better than what I could give you at the time. I was doing what I thought was best for you at the time.

So, yes, I grieve for the life we could have had together. But I also look forward to the future, to see what else is in my master plan--and yours! I love you with all my heart. Never forget that, baby girl. Never forget.

Starting over.

As I sit and listen to the rain, the constant rain outside on the windows--I realize how much I love my life and how proud I am of myself. I realize how narcissistic that sounds, but sometimes I feel you have to embrace your own accomplishments. I'm not going to sit and write down for you all that I have accomplished, if you know me--you know!

I am going to sit here and write about how scary it is to be accomplished, especially if not many people you know have your same experiences. I am feeling a lot of pressure lately...what are you doing to do? are you going to get a job? where are you going to live? how was it overseas? what did you do? what was it like? I have a lot going on right now. Please, just give me some time. I've been back in the country for two weeks! I need some time.

Newsflash! I am having strange lapses of memory, I get frustrated easily, and I'm scared. Yes folks, I said it. I'm scared of taking the GRE next month. I'm scared I won't get into grad school. I'm scared about substitute teaching. I'm scared that my noggin doesn't seem to want to cooperate lately. But thats okay with me! There is no one (hopefully) a few hundred yards out, off the road who wants me dead. I don't have to wonder if my best friend is going to make it back to base without getting blown up. I don't have to think about what if someone dies this time? The stress of taking the GRE is extremely large! However, it is no where near comparable to the stress of wondering if your friends are alive or not...or if they just had some mechanical issues that made them a day late.

Rain....mmmm....oh how I love the rain. Its so peaceful.

Breathe in....breathe out...smile...things are going to be just fine.

I have spent a lovely couple of days visiting my Aunt and Uncle's house in Northern Illinois as well as my most favorite cousin and her two beautiful girls. We have had the opportunity to catch up and it has been wonderful! I feel like I have gotten just what I needed out of this visit--some motivation. I miss my family, and am ready to go home. I am looking forward to doing some volunteer work with my grandma, visiting and reestablishing relationships with family, helping out around the house, brushing up on my culinary skills, and hopefully substitute teaching while studying for that darn GRE and applying to graduate school to get my doctorate in Audiology.

So before I get too motivated and stay up all night thinking about my new plans, off to bed!

I am hoping with the new and improved access to technology, I will be able to write more often. Be prepared for some random thoughts! ;) Those who know me, know my brain works like a ping pong ball, changing thought every time it strikes a surface!

Here's to starting over!

*My short-term memory is not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my short-term memory's not as sharp as it used to be.* --tee hee hee

The Evolution of a Runner

By Spc. Tara A. Keehner

As the old adage goes, "you don't know what you've got until it's gone." It takes a fairly precocious child to be able to process this at a very young age. However, Spc. Zebedee M. Johnson qualifies as one of those rare individuals.

Paralyzed at the budding age of eight, Johnson was immobile for nearly a year of his childhood. After losing the ability to have a "normal" childhood, Johnson developed a new appreciation for a capacity he had previously taken for granted. His new found gratitude for walking soon evolved into an infatuation with running. " At the age of 13, I had a parent who saw me run. They contacted my parents about running track (Amateur Athletic Union), which is a program for the youth," recalled Johnson. After receiving the approval of his parents, Johnson began to run competitively and never looked back.

Throughout middle school and high school, Johnson continued to run for the track and field teams in high school and with AAU. It wasn't until his senior year of high school, once Johnson won the North Carolina State High School 400-meter race that he began to see running as a means to fund his college education.

After visiting numerous schools all over North Carolina, Johnson was convinced Western Carolina University was the school for him. Persuaded by the chance to better himself, Johnson was certain. "The coach sold me on an education and a chance to improve, heavily, in track and field," said Johnson. Not only was it a turning point for Johnson's life, it was also an important mark in the school's history. It was the first time that the school offered a full scholarship to a freshman.

From August 2004 through July 2008, Johnson ran with the WCU Catamounts, all while earning a bachelor's degree in Business. Along the way, Johnson set the bar high and proved to the athletic program they did not make a mistake in bringing him on board. Johnson claimed the 200-meter Indoor Record and was also a member of the record-setting 4x100-meter Relay Team, for his school. Johnson also left a lasting impression with former college coach, Danny Williamson. On a phone interview Williamson spoke of Johnson fondly, "Zeb was a very outstanding young man in our program. First-class individual. Highly competitive individual. And I wish we had about 500 more like him."

Following his college graduation, Johnson ran a couple of professional and semi-professional meets to test the waters of professional running. Even though the possibilities of running for New Balance and Adidas appeared to be promising, Johnson was not convinced. It was stable enough to provide for him and his growing son. With a bleak job market that offered few considerable long-term career opportunities, Johnson was motivated to enlist in the Army full--time in October of 2009.

Shortly after completing his Initial Basic Training, Johnson was knee-deep in deployment preparations with his first and current duty assignment, the 377th Transportation Company out of Fort Bliss, Texas. Before long, Johnson and his unit deployed to Camp Arifjan, Kuwait, and he was, yet again largely involved in his mission at hand. Towards the end of the deployment, Johnson was presented with more free time, and he was able to take on additional activities outside of work. Running was becoming a part of his life again. His unit began to see the zeal Johnson had for running as well as his unique talent, and pushed him to pursue his love of running.

The 718th Transportation Battalion Iron Chariot Athletic Challenge was just the jump-start Johnson needed to "get back in the game." Even though Johnson participated in numerous events during the challenge, his shining moment came when he won the 100-meter dash, fueling his fervor to take his running to the next level. Nearing the end of his deployment, Johnson began looking forward to his homecoming to set goals for his running. The 377th was there cheering him every step of the way. Johnson said, "They have encouraged me to go out for the trials in 2012, the United States (Olympic) Trials." Even though excitement and nervousness are still present, lofty goals are nothing new to this determined Soldier and he just wants one last shot. Johnson claimed. "I just want any sign that I might still have a little bit left in the tank...any sign..."

Johnson showed he did indeed have a little bit left. He finished the preliminary race with a time of 10.99 seconds in the 100-meter dash. In the finals of the 100-meter dash, Johnson took off on the start and fell. After quickly recovering and taking off down the lane, he had a lot of ground to cover. He dug deep down inside himself and came out victorious with a time of 10.81 seconds. His company was ecstatic about the win and proud of their Soldier.

The week after the race, different members of the 377th Transportation Company motivated Johnson day in and day out. The replacement unit had arrived and company missions were down to zero, leaving plenty of time for training. Johnson got up around 3 a.m. to run, lift weights, and train with different members of his company. In the afternoon, he trained again. He left Camp Arifjan a few weeks after the race, with enough motivation to accomplish his goals. He continues to train and has made some plans for the upcoming season. "As of right now, I have a couple of indoor track meets set up for January," said Johnson. "We have a home track meet in March that I'm trying to enter in, in front of my home crowd back in Charlotte...I will always find competition. I might have to drive to go get it, but I'm willing to prepare."